I want to talk about stillness and making time for this every day.

When I talk about stillness, I don’t mean what you might initially think, like having to meditate for half an hour each day. I mean taking time for yourself, to allow your mind to find some stillness and to really allow yourself to go inward and listen to your intuition, what your body, your mind and your soul need.

This is something I’m incredibly passionate about because I used to be very detached from myself, from what I wanted and needed, I was one of those very busy people who distracted myself from the things that weren’t okay with my life by always being switched on, through a stressful job that demanded so much of me, going out all the time, spending, doing. Never just being.

Taking the time to start slowing down and being still was life changing for me. It allowed me to actually start to get life in perspective. I realised that with more time I actually spent a lot less because I was happier and I wasn’t looking for something to fill that hole inside of me.

If this is you, and you’re currently stuck in a cycle of busy, of doing instead of being, but you want to make a change, you want more time every day for yourself to start understanding what you do actually want, keep reading.

I’m going to talk through four things you can start doing right now to help create more space in your day.

You have to make choices

In order to make space for yourself, you first need to decide what’s important to you in your life right now and then consciously prioritise this. If you know that you’re feeling run down, burnt out, unmotivated, frustrated, and you want more space in the day to start reconnecting to yourself and having some space to figure out where you go from this point, you first need to actually decide this is what you’re going to do.

Write it down, stick it up on the walls of your house, say it out lout each morning when you wake up.

Then you have to make choices that will enable this to become a reality. This is going to involve saying no and being really honest with yourself and those around you.

Communicate your choices and needs to others.

This might be something that you’re not very used to doing but it will get easier with practise.

For example, my morning routine is really important to me, it gives me the space I need in the morning to feel mentally and physically ready for the day. Because of that, I don’t schedule any work in before 9am. I know I need this time so I block it out every day and I make it clear that any meetings can’t start before 9am.

You need to get organised

What I’ve learnt from experience is that healthy habits don’t form for me unless I first get really organised and schedule them into my day. I’m naturally quite an organised person, I love writing to do lists and usually know what I need to prioritise each day.  

Planning this time in each day for yourself is also helping you consciously prioritise yourself which is a really positive mindset to get yourself into.

If organisation isn’t something, you’re good at then give it a try for a month in a way that works for you and see what impact it has on your life. If good old pen and paper aren’t right for you, then try using your calendar on your phone, or you can use a whole load of online tools like Evernote which helps you organise your to do lists – getting push notifications from an app might also be helpful if you need the extra reminder. 

Do something that you enjoy

Finding a space for yourself each day and helping your mind find stillness doesn’t have to involve 20 minutes of meditating or yoga. That’s great if that works for you, but it also doesn’t work for a lot of people and as a result, a lot of people then give up and think that it’s impossible for them to create a space for themselves where they can relax or tune into your intuition/inner voice. 

Finding stillness looks and feels different for everyone and I want to encourage you to experiment with different things.

Maybe it’s about creating a really beautiful space for yourself in your home that you want to spend time in, this could even be a little corner of your room that you have a lovely picture, flowers, candles that you like, any objects that are meaningful to you. And you can go to this space at any point in the day, even for five minutes and sit, or lie down and close your eyes.

Maybe writing is a really therapeutic tool for you and it helps you process and make sense of the world, there’s a method of writing called morning pages where you free write (whatever comes into your mind) every morning when you wake up.

Maybe it’s dancing and moving your body that helps you find stillness and clarity in your mind. If that’s the case then make a beautiful playlist and play one track each day and just dance around your home.

Have an indulgent bath each evening if that works for you. Light some candles, play your favourite tunes.

Self pleasure might also be a way of helping you relax, focus on yourself and come into the moment. If so, allocate space and time for this. Or experiment with this. Start by dressing up in an outfit or underwear that make you feel sensual and beautiful and simply stroke your skin. See how it makes you feel, what comes up for you.

The space that you create for yourself can be anything that works for you. It just needs to be something that helps you be present, allows you to hear messages from yourself, and a space that centres you, what you want and makes you feel special.

Look at what’s preventing you from taking time for yourself

If you’ve got to this point, or you’ve tried to make time for yourself and it just never seems to happen then ask yourself why. And get really fucking honest with yourself. Time is about choices and prioritise. These are things that we all have to make. So, ask yourself why you’re never choosing to prioritise yourself.

Sit with this question and write what comes up for you.

Maybe there’s an underlying belief that you don’t deserve time for yourself?

Maybe you don’t believe that you’re important enough to make time for?

Once you’ve uncovered these you can start to reframe them and begin shifting your mindset into valuing yourself. For example, an engrained belief might be that being there for everyone else is more important than making time for you. Your reframe might be: making time for myself means that I can be the best version of myself for the people who need me.

As I’ve said, I’m really passionate about this because it’s the gateway to so much more.

If you’d like further support then book a call with me below.